Wednesday, January 4, 2012

World of Warcraft and Polyamory.

Ok so here is a back ground on WoW for those of you who don't play.  You pick a character, (name, race, class, features, etc) then you go out into the bright computer pixel world and get your game on.  You do quests, get gear and level up from 1 to 85 (thank you to the idiots at blizzard that thought 80 just wasn't high enough grr!).  

Level 1-10 is quick, wham bam thank ya mam. Kinda like a quickie against the refrigerator.  

Then 10-20 is a little slower, however at this point you think you're a bad ass (your not) and start doing instances/dungeons (these are where groups of 5 people get together and play a particular area together to get gear and gold).  This is also the level people start doing battlegrounds (similar to dungeons except your going against other players not computer controlled monsters and bosses) and you really think your all that until you get your ass handed to you by someone 6 levels higher then you. 

So then 20-30 now this is kinda where you start thinking "ok I am just gonna quest and level up, mind my own business get gold and gear. Maybe do a few dungeons, but mostly grind my way thru levels". This is usually a fairly calm time, not too much yelling at the computer screen, but you do spend A LOT of time on the game and not participating in life as we know it. 

Ah then 30-40, well pretty much the rest of the way to 85, you are a dungeon running fool.  Instance after instance, gear gear gear. Unless you are PVP (player vs. player) then you spend you day beating the crap outta other players outside of orgrimmar just so your name shows up in the chat windows and you do battlegrounds all day, all night....Cyber bulling at its best for some people lol. 

Now. Lets say you have made it thru to level 85 (marriage in tact) and you have run dungeons til your fingers have bled from mashing keys. You have epic gear, everyone on your server knows your name, your guild is full of raiding people and you are ready to jump into the coup de gra.....40 man raids.....Your golden, you have made it to the pinnacle, life is grand. No one can whip your ass, you got money, gear, friend's...25 extra pounds of body fat, but who is counting.

Now, here are the similarities....

You are in a monogamous relationship, or single, your interested in polyamory, but you are that level 1 noob.  You know who you are(kinda), what you can and can't do (kinda, but not really), you start seeking people out, or they inadvertently seek you out.  Life is exciting/fun you are starting down that path, doing research, learning stuff but you have yet to pull that sword from its scabbard.  Fairly simple, easy enough.

Then you move into that 10-20 range.  You got this (the hell you do) you crash head first into trade chat "looking for group".  Some poor, unsuspecting folks, say "hey come play with us".  Off you go and enter this relationship with these people and  BAM! Welcome to Level 20 Boss "polyamory".  Your sword breaks, your helmet goes rolling,  you forget what button on your keyboard is attack and basically have your ass handed to you.  

You fall into this relationship feeling like you know it all when you have not got a clue.  But you got this remember?  Ok, lets make rules, ya that's it.  Lets control people's actions and feelings so that you feel better. Ya that will help. Ok, now lets make sure we know that those people fighting with us are really fighting AGAINST us, ya that's it, that is what they are doing it is their fault...Hmmm I thought you said  you had this....hmmm seems like a mound of shit to me. however, now you're in this boss fight and you don't have a clue what to do, so you fight and fuss and claw your way thru. 

Somehow you manage to make it to level 20, a ton of fighting and a hell of a repair bill behind you, with some new tools and equipment to help you.   You decide that your just going to work thru things, do what needs to be done, fix problems and keep moving forward.  Make things better for you and everyone.  So everyone kinda starts settling down, routines are learned, rules are dropped, people start to live. Pretty cool, this is what we were looking for a few levels ago. 

And then you hit level 30, ha ha ha you're a bad ass but your smart. You have figured out what works with your partners, their other partners, etc etc.  You have realized that some things are your fault, some aren't and trying to figure those things out and live together.  You have decided that those people fighting against you are actually fighting for those same goals WITH you. You have learned to be secure in your relationships, for the most part, and you have kept in mind that your partner's didn't do this to hurt you. Quite the opposite. 

You have made it to that point you thought you were going to just start at. You have made your way to 85.  fought fight after fight, got a ton of new gear, tools and equipment.  If you can make it thru the 10's, the 20's, the 30's, if you can fight the fights that need to be fought, learn the skills to make you a better person, level your intelligence, your ability to reason and your ability to think outside the box, then you have made it where we all want to go. That place where you come home, say "hi, I love you" (without wondering who you kiss first) and live your life without thinking about everything all the time.  

Your goal now, at level 85, PASS ON THAT KNOWLEDGE. Teach those noobs you CANNOT go into polyamory and start out as a level 85, geared out, bad ass. hell you can't even start out at level 25!  No matter how much experience you THINK you have at being in a monogamous relationship, or how much you have researched that level 20 boss "POLYAMORY", its going to one shot you every single time til you go slow, level by level, fight by fight.  To do anything else is to epically fail every time you put your clothes on or take them off.